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The body is translucent, making it quite difficult to spot in the turbid waters of its home. Burroughs' Naked Lunch to Chuck Palahniuk's Fight Club ; and invariably it serves as shorthand for the worst thing that could possibly happen to a human being. Perhaps most horrifying of all are the remedies offered for a candiru in the privates. Another account was documented by biologist George A. From what experts know of the candiru they do not possess powerful enough jaws to do this. A lingua franca is widely used in the Amazon, based on the language spoken by the Tupi, one of the area's most important ethnic groups.

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Also known as the toothpick or vampire fish, this little river monster has swum up your penis and lodged itself in position using its umbrella like spines.


How foolish could you be? The European interlopers may well have spoken it, but we can safely assume they were not fluent. Using its umbrella like opercular spines on its head, the candiru fixes itself in position to feast on blood from the vessel-rich lining of the gills. This tale has been told everywhere: Despite their vampire-like feeding habits, these parasites are insignificant in the vast, muddy depths of the Amazon.

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